Stars of the Deep

I'm not easily fooled; I pride myself in that.  I may have travelled down as far as I could, and I may have seen some freaky stuff, but that doesn't prove a damn thing.   In the end it all comes down to what you allow yourself to believe.  But, I don't think telling you what I saw would convince anyone else.  It's something you have to see for yourself.  Real or hallucination, it's your choice.

They say the bottom of the ocean is the world's last mystery.  From there, it's off to the moon, outer space.  Lucky for me, we haven't figured out the ocean yet.  There are places yet untouched.  Personally, I hope we never discover ever secret the ocean holds.  Why do we need to know everything?  That would be boring.
 
But, fascination draws a person to the unknown and so I took a highly sophisticated, technological submarine down, further than a lot of scientist hope to go.  It was dark and, like the fog, it has a way of making a person feel extremely isolated.  It doesn't matter if you have people checking in with you every five minutes or if the radio is blaring.  Seeing nothing all pressing around you makes you feel alone.


If I was less of an adventurer I'd have been terrified.  The silence and the nothingness and the idea that the ocean could crunch you into a squished cube at any second are enough to freak anyone out.  But, my curiosity was strong, perhaps too strong and that made me a bit careless.  I allowed the sub to drift a bit off course and that's when it happened.

All of the lights went out.  I don't know why, but just the lights, everything else was still working until the craft drifted under the ridge.  Then communications were blocked.  Thankfully life support was still running, though I still don't understand how.  We'll call it a miracle.
In the dark a panic began rising in my chest.  I was trying to breathe normally reminding myself that no matter how panicked I became my situation was still the same.  I stared out into the darkness.  I don't know what I was looking for but it was better than staring at the dead controls in the ship.  I continued to stare out, hoping to see something, anything really.

At first I thought I must be hallucinating.  I wanted to see something so badly that I was imagining a slight glow coming from far back in the cave under the ridge.  But, as it got closer, it also got brighter.  My heart was beating fast in anticipation.  What had I discovered?  Was it dangerous?  I began fumbling again with the controls trying anything to get them going so I could get out from under the ridge.  Nothing worked still.
 
I could do nothing but wait and drift in my nonresponsive ship.  More lights became visible away from the craft.  I was getting nervous and a little cold.  I waited and watched the lights coming closer for five minutes.  The suspense was killing me.  Then it swam by.

It was a large creature, but it moved with a slow grace.  It almost floated through the water and it billowed like silk in the wind.  Lights grew out of its skin and it glowed like a star-filled sky.  The rest of the creatures approached where the ship was.  Their movements were slowly dragging the ship back toward the opening of the ridge, like somehow they could sense I needed their help.

Around swirled the creatures of the deep that looked like the night sky they had never seen.  The creatures looked delicate, but the depths they swam and lived at suggested otherwise.  I was in awe of their lighted beauty.  I wanted to capture the memory of them and keep it forever.  With a sinking feeling, I realized without photographic proof no one would believe me or understand how incredible these creatures were.

When I was finally pulled back out from under the ridge the creatures disappeared.  The lights came back on in the ship and the little engine powered back up.  As soon as everything was functional the crew's messages from the surface started buzzing in.  There was a panic up top; the little pod had been out of reach for fifteen minutes.  Fifteen glorious minutes alone with the stars of the deep.

I didn't tell anyone.  But I wanted to write it down so in case I die, at least someone will know.   I couldn't tell anyone, they'd think I was crazy.  That experience changed my life.  Sometimes it's hard to pick out the moments that really change you, but that was definitely one of those moments when you believe you have seen one of God's rare creations.  There is no chance it couldn't change your life, seeing something like that.



 Stars of the Deep © 2012 Katherine Kovanda

Sun Song

To My Future,

It was I who broke the darkness.  It isn't like I meant to, but it happened.  Some things you just can't undo.  I surged into existence and that is when it happened.  Just like that.  And I'm not bragging.  I'm simply stating fact.  I exist, therefore the darkness is broken.

I like shining down on things.  I light the way, scare away the fears that lurk when I'm gone.  I oversee the worlds that I light, guiding the life forms below me.  Yesterday I turned four and a half and I considered it a pretty special occasion.  I've been glowing so long that my planets don't even remember what it was like to live in the dark.

But I remember.  It was like yesterday when they blinked into my light.  They stretched and began turning, soaking in the heat I provided.  It was new, an experience to shed their fears.  The planets let my light chase away the dark.  But, some of them didn't like being so warm, so they took turns deciding where to dwell.  When they finally decided, it felt right and for the most part, they stay where they decided.

Watching the worlds turn and exist and live is like watching a novel unfold in your hands.  It is really gratifying knowing that all that exists is living because of me.  I'm holding all this life together.  Every day I shed light to darkness and give hope to the far sides of the planets.  As long as I am expected to shine, the fears of night wash away at dawn.

My birthday was special.  It always is special.  And occasionally to celebrate being alive I perform wondrous things.  I love creating color splashes across the sky as I leave one place for another.  To make it extra spectacular sometimes I make sure there are clouds so that my colors bounce around and magnify themselves.  I know some beings are too busy to care, but somewhere someone is watching in awe.

Watching isn't always easy, though.  I watch over my planets and sometimes bad things happen.  I can't help but watch and I can't help at all.  The only thing I can do is keep shining and wish that they could feel how much I hurt for them.  I hurt when Mars lost all civilized life.  I hurt when Pluto was deserted for warmer climates.  I hurt every time the human race goes to war.  But in all of those places love heals the wounds and the hope that I will come up again tomorrow and that it will be a better day carries people into the new dawn.

I don't know what will happen when I am on death's door.  I hope another youngster comes to take my place and teach this system some new things.  I've seen these stars pass by searching for a home and I can only hope they find one as good as mine.  I may not be the best, and I might not burn the brightest, but I am constant and I provide well for my system.  I am filled with pride for the life I witness.  And, as all of us should, I wrote a little poem to last as my legacy long after I'm gone.

For, as I turn, life goes on; and as they turn, day comes, a new dawn.
Hope springs from the dark and love dwells in each heart and as I wax poetic,
Each soul gets a fresh start.
This is my story and I will keep spinning on,
A furnace with a heart and a sun with a song.

Truly yours,

Sun




 Sun Song © 2012 Katherine Kovanda